tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Will I ever understand? the sound of someone calling my name woke me this morning... it must have been a dream? maybe? or did his voice travel through time and space.. or was it realities? My dreams have been hidden from me.. or have they not been there and was he calling, wanting to know where I was? I just don't know and can't understand, it seems. my cat did not die.. after a week of barely moving.. not being able to make it to the litter box... not eating.. yesterday she finally started acting well.. she wanted tuna fish juice. You may wonder how I know she wanted that... I just did... I understand my animals. I assume she has used another of her 9 lives, I signed up yesterday to start karate... not as a defense thing but as something to do. Monday night I will start.. they have an over 30 crowd which I should fit well in, my friends say. My son had belt testing yesterday morning.. he is now a blue belt w/ black stripe... and a couple that are my age ( almost ) were there. They had coached my son in soccer and now that their children were older felt that they needed soemthing to do so they started with karate. They talked me into it.. or at least to try. So I was given my outfit.. my ghi, I think it is called... and when I got home and tried it on... way way too big. Now that makes a person feel good. My brother talked me into going to the dance last night. I had fun... so I wouldn't have to talk...we danced.. lots. and I saw friends that live in this area that I have been reaaly amiss in keeping in touch.. friends that I really do like their company..friends that I am vowing to stay in touch. and then there was the networking thing.. a friends brother.. actually he is close to me.. we did scouts together... he asked about my job.. I told him what was going on and he said I need to take the civil service exam... he wants to talk with me about it... get me prepared so I will be settled and safe.. It was strange to hear the worry in his voice. and everyone skirted the d issue... except one.. the one I expected.. but she was nice.. she was still shocked at my refusal the night before to come to their get together. and i saw people that i had ot seen in many many years... and one that told me how much I had influenced her life... gave me reminders of events that had happened. It was nice.. and surprising. and S was there and I decided I really didn't have any real feelings for him... it was just he was someone who might understand where I was at ... might.. not attraction.. just that he was a nice guy and maybe into some of the things I thought about. It was a good night, but I was glad to come home.. we left early... not very early.. just 1/2 hour early... my brother had too much to drink and had decided he was in love... again. I, of course, did not drink and so by that time of night when everyone has had more than their share of drinks.. it was time to go. This morning... it's beautiful outside.. Now... if I understood why he was calling me. 9:11 a.m. - 2003-07-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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