tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3 wishes & smiling the gods have not failed me. I ask and they answer. Last night I started to get weak. I had gone out to dinner with L and we went walking the gorge and went for ice cream at this really cool old fashion type ice cream parlor... we had fun ... our normal type fun... he kisses me hello... we have fun...we hike.. we see a movie..we eat.. he kisses me good night.. end of story. We never talk about us... we just talk.. about all types of things.. about who we are... well, I tell him only what I think he can handle of who I am..we talk about our boys... we just talk.. never about a future for us... never about where this is going.. just talk... and then he walks me to my car or to my door and we kiss good by. Until last night... last night he said we needed to make quality time for us.. alone time... and I just smiled & said we'll have to talk about that another time... I guess I was surprised... and didn't know how to react. He caught me off guard... it's not as if there had been any real contact between us... just me grabbing his hand when I started to slip in the river... or him taking my hand to help me up over a fallen tree stump.. and then always dropping it immediately after. I thought about him on the drive home.. and then I thought of D.. and differences... and how I really felt... I asked the gods for guidance.. signs... and when I got home...my son said D had called.. I was to call him back. and I knew... nothing much has changed. and I ended up telling D that I was coming out soon. and the gods answered me in ways only I would understand. and this morning as I feel the connection.. I'm thinking of 3 wishes... and smiling. 12:35 p.m. - 2003-08-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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