tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- am I going backwards or towards and the old man was just there... a figure looming in the mist ... the white swirly mist. where are we I asked as there were no distinguishing landmarks... no trees... no stones... as if my feet were not touching the earth as I knew it... Where are we? as I started to panic realizing I was not anywhere I knew I should be. Nowheres and everywheres was his reply. Have I died? I asked.. before he could answer... what about James... and D? Where are they... and then the real panic settled. The old man laughed... his laugh calming me from inside out. You have answered your own question he laughingly said. My own question... Where are they... I can't answer that... I don't know where I am.. how can I find them? His voice became soothing as I looked at his face... really looked at his face... I thought he looked so wise... with all those lines in his face... his white beard and hair... I thought he looked like Gandolf... but his eyes.. those deep penetrating eyes. Not that question he said... Remeber what you asked the gods before you went to sleep... when you tried to travel... when you tried to find the truth... That question... Remember.. I thought back... and I did remember... but where is the answer I asked... He laughed again... You answered it yourself when you were worried that you had died.. You only asked about 2 people.. no one else... your thoughts were only for those whom your soul could not leave... I seems I have thought about nothing else the whole night thru as I then tossed and turned in my restless sleep. My soul needs to play with him... I need him in ways again I have never understood... so many levels... and now upon waking... I want to touch his face... look into his eyes and see his truth.. Have I gone backwards or forwards? only the gods know... sometimes I am so confused. 7:56 a.m. - 2003-09-08 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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