tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- but the reliving was wonderful - if only for the moment It sat there in my in box. just seeing his on line addy felt like my soul was being caressed. the subject line made me curious.. as if somehow he knew where my mind was going lately and his had been going there also. I let myself think that.. reveling in that burst of love for a moment... a long moment. so I wanted to pretend that this was before and I smiled thinking ... it was from him... my soul eager to run to that place of sunshine and green. I was alive... and in love and loved... I remembered that feeling when I would get something in my inbox from him... before...that smile deep inside.. always ready to burst into laughter.. but then before my feet left the ground floating in possibilities... truth entered.. yep, reared his forceful head and said.. don't expect too much.. so I opened it, with just a hint of sadness for I knew it would not say what I would want it to. he had been thinking of me.. hoped I was alright... doing his duty as distant friends mught do ... nothing more... not even needing a reply. for a reply would mean I thought he actually had been interested in my life.. in me. and I know better... it was sent out of boredom... or as a result of something going on in his life.. or just because he thought he should. but certainly not needing a reply. 7:12 a.m. - 2007-03-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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