tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the sum is better The sum is much better than either of its parts. I threw the stones this morning... 3 times... I know, but I did anyway. The girl in my office will ask me as she does every morning... Did you throw them for him? and please tell me you didn't do them for the two of you ...so I did... never one to do what anyone else thinks I should. I didn't like what it had to say about me... and liked what it had to say about him... and just was puzzled by the "we" Exact words.."When Teiwaz comes in response to a question about romantic attachment, it indicates that the relationship is both timely and providential. The bond is to a partner with whom you resonate; there is work for you to do together. Well that's just fine... we are not even communicating except through my dreams and when I feel him. and speaking of dreams... he was there in my dreams again... disturbing though. I wasn't sure if I felt so physical towards him anymore... as if I would ever be able to be physical with him again.... even in my dreams. I had wondered why in my dreams it very rarely got physical... and then I thought maybe it is because what I feel when I feel him... when our souls are attached is enough.. I had gone to sleep thinking of him... thinking of our physicalness... but it was different. Don't know how to explain. Yes I do... it would be the laid bareness of my soul that I don't think I could ever do again with him. doesn't change how I feel... but it must have to do with the trust issue again.. not sure... but the dream was sad for me. I don't usually have a dream in which I am sad if he is in it.. but there it was... the sadness has now entered my dreams... does that mean another step on the road to recovery? 6:21 a.m. - 2003-01-15 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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