tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- just another summer day why can't I remember the movements to my kata? Why can't I mimic what is shown in front of me? Tonite is karate.. I need to remember these movements.. and I can't. I don't understand why. my son says not to worry that it will be alright... I wonder. and I am becoming comfortable with my aloneness with each passing day though the phone calls have come to go to karaoke tomorrow... not sure if I want to quite honestly.. yes, I know he will be there and he makes me smile.. his face and smile so open at times... I like how I feel in his presence though he has no idea I do nor can I bring myself to let him know... not going that way again. but I wil consider it., sometimes I feel that I am still crying... that I have never stopped... deep inside. I try most days to not go that far inside me but some days it's closer to the surface.. that's when I know... my heart has never stopped crying. 6:43 a.m. - 2003-07-30 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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