tarkis's Diaryland Diary

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where do I go?

where oh where will my new dwelling place be?????
I hate this uncertainty. I hate not even having a strong urge toward any one direction.. just a little easier winters... my only thought.

I thought possibly I would have fallen madly passionately in love by now and that would help resolve the direction.
Problem is.. I did and he didn't so the one direction I felt the best in would probably not be the direction to go as then the sadness of rejection would be more than I could handle.

Another direction pulling me is probably not the way to go.. that sadness if it didn't work out would do me in I am afraid and I am not ready to go thru this again.

if only my son's future was certain.. that might help with decisions... though why that should be important.. I know his thoughts on where he wants me to live.

this morning time seems to be going by so quickly.. so much needs to be done.
want it to be decided.. that perfect place for me.

Where oh where has my place gone?

6:55 a.m. - 2005-01-11

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