tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- just a few days left Morning now... the dawn just breaking.. I haven't slept much. It is the beginning of the end.. and a whole new life unfolding. In just a few short days James will be off to college.. 7 hrs away. I worry that I have protected him too much from life.. sheltered him from pain.. but isn't that what a parent is to do? Have I prepared him well enough? I am afraid.. that I have failed and he will suffer for it. He had his first drink this weekend. He went to another party.. this one had alcohol.. he tried a Rum & Coke and did not like it.. did not finish.. left the party early.. got a ride with a friend and came home and talked with me about it. He tried it because he hadn't before.. because he wanted to say No because he didn't want to.. not because it was not legal.. He wanted to make it his choice. He did. He talked about those at the party and how they acted.. he compared it to a party he had been to the night before.. no drinking... how much fun it had been. He talked about how some of the girls he graduated and how much he had lost respect for them seeing them at the party... how they acted. I smiled and was sooo very proud of my son... but have I done enough? We went thru papers last night.. got his schedule set... I panicked.. will my baby be alright? Of course he will.. he is a child of the gods and has his head together far better than most.. He will be alright.. but at least my concern for him takes away thoughts of what the gods have in store for me... or at least what I have placed before me. my new life begins in just a few short days also... my life without child.. my life. 5:58 a.m. - 2005-08-15 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||