tarkis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- he is doing well. and so the day has come and gone. Leaving the kid was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Trusting in the gods and the words of the dean and rectors and priests that they will take care of my son... especially when trust is what I need to work on this time around. Again, stepping foot on campus.. that feeling unlike any I had felt on any of the many campuses we stepped foot on.. I knew he was where he was meant to be.. and he did too. He was happy. I am not so worried about his safety now.. just that I miss him. It has been just the 2 of us for so long.. and now to find my path as he is starting on his. I met a lot of adults.. even I was surprised at how well I did... though coming back to the hotel and sensing that my aloneness is more a timeless event than a mere happening at the moment.. even sleep could not give relief. He called shortly after I got home.. wanted to know how close I was to home.. He was on his way to a coffeeshop... I told him to stay safe.. we talked then.. not as child to parent but person to person.. as he told me the events of the day and what his thoughts and plans were... His last words though... are you alright? what will you do now? Sure... and haven't decided ... though inside my soul was screaming... NO... NO... NO... and tears this morning are only because I miss him... and feel now... my loneliness is complete. 7:07 a.m. - 2005-08-22 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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